Holidays on Ice

Author: David Sedaris

Publisher: Little, Brown

ISBN: 9780316073639

Category: Humor

Page: 128

View: 9025

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David Sedaris's beloved holiday collection is new again with six more pieces, including a never before published story. Along with such favorites as the diaries of a Macy's elf and the annals of two very competitive families, are Sedaris's tales of tardy trick-or-treaters ("Us and Them"); the difficulties of explaining the Easter Bunny to the French ("Jesus Shaves"); what to do when you've been locked out in a snowstorm ("Let It Snow"); the puzzling Christmas traditions of other nations ("Six to Eight Black Men"); what Halloween at the medical examiner's looks like ("The Monster Mash"); and a barnyard secret Santa scheme gone awry ("Cow and Turkey"). No matter what your favorite holiday, you won't want to miss celebrating it with the author who has been called "one of the funniest writers alive" (Economist).

Holidays on Ice

Author: David Sedaris

Publisher: Hachette UK

ISBN: 0316073636

Category: Humor

Page: 300

View: 1421

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David Sedaris's beloved holiday collection is new again with six more pieces, including a never before published story. Along with such favorites as the diaries of a Macy's elf and the annals of two very competitive families, are Sedaris's tales of tardy trick-or-treaters ("Us and Them"); the difficulties of explaining the Easter Bunny to the French ("Jesus Shaves"); what to do when you've been locked out in a snowstorm ("Let It Snow"); the puzzling Christmas traditions of other nations ("Six to Eight Black Men"); what Halloween at the medical examiner's looks like ("The Monster Mash"); and a barnyard secret Santa scheme gone awry ("Cow and Turkey"). No matter what your favorite holiday, you won't want to miss celebrating it with the author who has been called "one of the funniest writers alive" (Economist).

Holidays on Ice

Author: David Sedaris

Publisher: Little Brown & Company

ISBN: N.A

Category: Fiction

Page: 123

View: 7727

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An anthology of humorous Christmas tales and essays features excerpts from the author's "Barrel Fever" and "Naked," as well as "The Santaland Diaries," "Season's Greetings to Our Friends and Family," and a new tale of holiday mayhem

When You Are Engulfed in Flames

Author: David Sedaris

Publisher: Little, Brown

ISBN: 9780316032513

Category: Humor

Page: 336

View: 2139

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"David Sedaris's ability to transform the mortification of everyday life into wildly entertaining art," (The Christian Science Monitor) is elevated to wilder and more entertaining heights than ever in this remarkable new book. Trying to make coffee when the water is shut off, David considers using the water in a vase of flowers and his chain of associations takes him from the French countryside to a hilariously uncomfortable memory of buying drugs in a mobile home in rural North Carolina. In essay after essay, Sedaris proceeds from bizarre conundrums of daily life-having a lozenge fall from your mouth into the lap of a fellow passenger on a plane or armoring the windows with LP covers to protect the house from neurotic songbirds-to the most deeply resonant human truths. Culminating in a brilliant account of his venture to Tokyo in order to quit smoking, David Sedaris's sixth essay collection is a new masterpiece of comic writing from "a writer worth treasuring" (Seattle Times). Praise for When You Are Engulfed in Flames: "Older, wiser, smarter and meaner, Sedaris...defies the odds once again by delivering an intelligent take on the banalities of an absurd life." --Kirkus Reviews This latest collection proves that not only does Sedaris still have it, but he's also getting better....Sedaris's best stuff will still--after all this time--move, surprise, and entertain." --Booklist Table of Contents: It's Catching Keeping Up The Understudy This Old House Buddy, Can You Spare a Tie? Road Trips What I Learned That's Amore The Monster Mash In the Waiting Room Solutions to Saturday's Puzzle Adult Figures Charging Toward a Concrete Toadstool Memento Mori All the Beauty You Will Ever Need Town and Country Aerial The Man in the Hut Of Mice and Men April in Paris Crybaby Old Faithful The Smoking Section

Barrel Fever

Stories and Essays

Author: David Sedaris

Publisher: Little, Brown

ISBN: 9780316031653

Category: Humor

Page: 208

View: 4712

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In David Sedaris' world, no one is safe and no cow is sacred. A manic cross between Mark Leyner, Fran Lebowitz, and the National Enquirer, Sedaris' collection of essays is a rollicking tour through the national Zeitgeist: a do-it-yourself suburban dad saves money by performing home surgery; a man who is loved too much flees the heavyweight champion of the world; a teenage suicide tries to incite a lynch mob at her funeral; a bitter Santa abuses the elves. David Sedaris made his debut on NPR's Morning Edition with "SantaLand Diaries", recounting his strange-but-true experiences as an elf at Macy's, and soon became one of the show's most popular commentators. With a perfect eye and a voice infused with as much empathy as wit, Sedaris writes stories and essays that target the soulful ridiculousness of our behavior. Barrel Fever is like a blind date with modern life, and anything can happen.

Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim

Author: David Sedaris

Publisher: Little, Brown

ISBN: 9780759511217

Category: Humor

Page: 272

View: 6006

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David Sedaris plays in the snow with his sisters. He goes on vacation with his family. He gets a job selling drinks. He attends his brother's wedding. He mops his sister's floor. He gives directions to a lost traveler. He eats a hamburger. He has his blood sugar tested. It all sounds so normal, doesn't it? In his newest collection of essays, David Sedaris lifts the corner of ordinary life, revealing the absurdity teeming below its surface. His world is alive with obscure desires and hidden motives -- a world where forgiveness is automatic and an argument can be the highest form of love. Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim is another unforgettable collection from one of the wittiest and most original writers at work today.

Holiday on Ice

Author: Jaci Burton

Publisher: Penguin

ISBN: 0698183096

Category: Fiction

Page: 127

View: 8304

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In this original holiday novella in the Play-By-Play series, New York Times bestselling author Jaci Burton gives readers the gift of “plenty of romance, sexy men, hot steamy loving, and humor.” (Smexy Books) Superstar hockey player Patrick “Trick” Niemeyer and dancer Stella Slovinski have picked up where they left off a year ago, resuming their hot, uncomplicated affair. Stella refuses to call it dating, or a relationship. But lately, Trick is looking for more… Stella’s been burned before—in a relationship she never talks about—not with her family, not with her friends, and definitely not with Trick. But now it’s the holiday season and Trick is determined to give Stella his heart wrapped up in a bow. He knows Stella is the right woman for him, but he’ll have to melt the ice surrounding her heart to keep her from walking away. Includes a preview of Jaci Burton’s QUARTERBACK DRAW and LOVE AFTER ALL. Praise for the novels of Jaci Burton “Jaci Burton does raw, passionate romance like no other.”—Joyfully Reviewed “A wild ride.”—#1 New York Times Bestselling Author Lora Leigh “The characters are incredible. They are human and complex and real and perfect.”—Night Owl Erotica “[Jaci Burton] delivers the passionate, inventive, sexually explicit love scenes that fans expect.”—USA Today Happy Ever After reviews

Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

Author: David Sedaris

Publisher: Little, Brown

ISBN: 0316125687

Category: Humor

Page: 288

View: 4435

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A guy walks into a bar car and... From here the story could take many turns. When this guy is David Sedaris, the possibilities are endless, but the result is always the same: he will both delight you with twists of humor and intelligence and leave you deeply moved. Sedaris remembers his father's dinnertime attire (shirtsleeves and underpants), his first colonoscopy (remarkably pleasant), and the time he considered buying the skeleton of a murdered Pygmy. With Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls, David Sedaris shows once again why his work has been called "hilarious, elegant, and surprisingly moving" (Washington Post).

Santaland Diaries

Author: David Sedaris

Publisher: Hachette UK

ISBN: 0748123075

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 160

View: 8444

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Santaland Diaries collects six of David Sedaris's most profound Christmas stories into one slender volume perfect for use as a last-minute coaster or ice-scraper. This drinking man's companion can be enjoyed by the warmth of a raging fire, the glow of a brilliantly decorated tree, or even in the back seat of a police car. It should be read with your eyes, felt with your heart, and heard only when spoken to. It should, in short, behave much like a book. And oh, what a book it is!

The Member of the Wedding

A Play

Author: Carson McCullers

Publisher: New Directions Publishing

ISBN: 9780811216555

Category: Drama

Page: 118

View: 7095

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Her brother's wedding intensifies a twelve-year-old's need to be recognized as an important person.

Squirrel Seeks Chipmunk

A Modest Bestiary

Author: David Sedaris

Publisher: Little, Brown

ISBN: 9780316131278

Category: Humor

Page: 176

View: 4556

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Featuring David Sedaris's unique blend of hilarity and heart, this new collection of keen-eyed animal-themed tales is an utter delight. Though the characters may not be human, the situations in these stories bear an uncanny resemblance to the insanity of everyday life. In "The Toad, the Turtle, and the Duck," three strangers commiserate about animal bureaucracy while waiting in a complaint line. In "Hello Kitty," a cynical feline struggles to sit through his prison-mandated AA meetings. In "The Squirrel and the Chipmunk," a pair of star-crossed lovers is separated by prejudiced family members. With original illustrations by Ian Falconer, author of the bestselling Olivia series of children's books, these stories are David Sedaris at his most observant, poignant, and surprising.

Naked

Author: David Sedaris

Publisher: Back Bay Books

ISBN: 9780316073622

Category: Humor

Page: 304

View: 8236

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In Naked, David Sedaris's message alternately rendered in Fakespeare, Italian, Spanish, and pidgin Greek is the same: pay attention to me. Whether he's taking to the road with a thieving quadriplegic, sorting out the fancy from the extra-fancy in a bleak fruit-packing factory, or celebrating Christmas in the company of a recently paroled prostitute, this collection of memoirs creates a wickedly incisive portrait of an all-too-familiar world. It takes Sedaris from his humiliating bout with obsessive behavior in A Plague of Tics to the title story, where he is finally forced to face his naked self in the mirrored sunglasses of a lunatic. At this soulful and moving moment, he picks potato chip crumbs from his pubic hair and wonders what it all means. This remarkable journey into his own life follows a path of self-effacement and a lifelong search for identity, leaving him both under suspicion and overdressed.

Calypso

Author: David Sedaris

Publisher: Little, Brown

ISBN: 0316392359

Category: Humor

Page: 272

View: 5678

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David Sedaris returns with his most deeply personal and darkly hilarious book. If you've ever laughed your way through David Sedaris's cheerfully misanthropic stories, you might think you know what you're getting with Calypso. You'd be wrong. When he buys a beach house on the Carolina coast, Sedaris envisions long, relaxing vacations spent playing board games and lounging in the sun with those he loves most. And life at the Sea Section, as he names the vacation home, is exactly as idyllic as he imagined, except for one tiny, vexing realization: it's impossible to take a vacation from yourself. With Calypso, Sedaris sets his formidable powers of observation toward middle age and mortality. Make no mistake: these stories are very, very funny--it's a book that can make you laugh 'til you snort, the way only family can. Sedaris's powers of observation have never been sharper, and his ability to shock readers into laughter unparalleled. But much of the comedy here is born out of that vertiginous moment when your own body betrays you and you realize that the story of your life is made up of more past than future. This is beach reading for people who detest beaches, required reading for those who loathe small talk and love a good tumor joke. Calypso is simultaneously Sedaris's darkest and warmest book yet--and it just might be his very best.

Foodimentary

Celebrating 365 Food Holidays with Classic Recipes

Author: John-Bryan Hopkins

Publisher: Wellfleet

ISBN: 1577151534

Category: Cooking

Page: 352

View: 8950

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Tired of the sporadic and outdated food holidays that were quietly celebrated each year—most of which were created by food companies to market their products—blogger John-Bryan Hopkins decided to revamp food celebrations and spice them up with his own favorite foods. Creating a food holiday for every day of the year, Hopkins launched Foodimentary.com, which became an immediate overnight success with Google adopting his bespoke calendar. With thousands of fans across multiple platforms, Foodimentary.com is the number-one go-to resource cited by numerous magazines, newspapers, and websites to definitively know which food is being celebrated and when. Mixing Hopkins’ online success with fun food facts, forgotten histories, and classic recipes, while folding in scrumptious illustrations and rare photographs, Foodimentary is a festive jubilee of America’s culinary roots and inventions, from today’s more recent novelties, such as Ranch Dressing Day (celebrated on March 10), to popular dishes of yesteryear such as National Thermidor Day (celebrated on January 24). Whether enjoyed à la carte or consumed in one sitting, get ready to be swept into a twelve-month course created exclusively by Foodimentary.com!

Squirrel Seeks Chipmunk

A Wicked Bestiary

Author: David Sedaris

Publisher: Hachette UK

ISBN: 0748133674

Category: Humor

Page: 192

View: 7480

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This collection of sharply observed animal-themed tales is a delight, told with David Sedaris's trademark blend of hilarity and goodnaturedness. Though the characters may not be human, the situations in these stories bear an uncanny resemblance to the insanity of our own everyday interactions. In 'The Toad, the Turtle, and the Duck', three strangers commiserate about animal bureaucracy while waiting in a complaint line. In 'Hello Kitty', a cynical feline struggles to sit through his prison-mandated AA meetings. In 'The Squirrel and the Chipmunk', a pair of star-crossed lovers is separated by prejudiced family members.

Dork Diaries 4

Tales from a Not-So-Graceful Ice Princess

Author: Rachel Renée Russell

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

ISBN: 1442411929

Category: Juvenile Fiction

Page: 347

View: 1411

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Nikki Maxwell is determined to help out Brandon save an animal shelter, but when she and her friends enter an ice skating competition to help raise money for the shelter, Mackenzie has to stick her nose in and cause trouble.

Holidays on Ice (Versione italiana)

Author: David Sedaris

Publisher: Edizioni Mondadori

ISBN: 8852015337

Category: Fiction

Page: 84

View: 9424

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Implacabile osservatore delle follie della modernità, Sedaris, comico sottile e spietato, racconta la sua esperienza come elfo natalizio in un grande magazzino di New York. Un dissacrante libello sul falso luccichio del Natale.

The Meaning of Consuelo

Author: Judith Ortiz Cofer

Publisher: Beacon Press

ISBN: 9780807083871

Category: Fiction

Page: 196

View: 8629

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The Signe family is blessed with two daughters. Consuelo, the elder, is thought of as pensive and book-loving, the serious child-la niña seria-while Mili, her younger sister, is seen as vivacious, a ray of tropical sunshine. Two daughters: one dark, one light; one to offer comfort and consolation, the other to charm and delight. But, for all the joy both girls should bring, something is not right in this Puerto Rican family; a tragedia is developing, like a tumor, at its core. In this fierce, funny, and sometimes startling novel, we follow a young woman's quest to negotiate her own terms of survival within the confines of her culture and her family. magazine "Judith Ortiz Cofer has created a character who takes us by the hand on a journey of self-discovery. She reminds readers young and old never to forget our own responsibilities, and to enjoy life with all its joys and sorrows."--Bessy Reyna, MultiCultural Review